A better future

As adults we know, everyone has a story.  We know that every single person has had battles, has had a loss, a broken heart as well as their own success stories.

My children, regardless of their ages are still learning this.  Something I strive for daily.  

Although judgement is a natural thought process, it is something that needs to be changed.  It starts as children.  

Let’s admit it, bullying starts here.  Children in school may see another child with what they perceive as a flaw and they can pick away at it.  Slowly, that one they’ve focused on believes less in themselves and without anyone noticing, they become less of a person they should be.  

All the while, that child who was picked on at school may be enduring a battle unknown to the world.  That child may be experiencing poverty, abuse, neglect.  

In the circle of things, abuse continues and that child may not know the difference.  

A perfect example is when I child watches a parent yell, that child will see it as normal, acceptable and will more than likely repeat that behaviour.  

When a child watches parents talk, discuss issues, that child will learn to do the same.

Teach your child to be open minded.  Teach your child, our future, compassion.  

If only for a moment, ask them to tell you what they think.  Take a moment and listen to yourself, hear your reactions to different situations, think about what your child is learning from you.  

In essence, when we try to make a change for our children, by opening up and discussion, we start to become more open minded, more understanding and empathy towards others ourselves.  

Not the door you were thinking of

Over our life time, we are constantly given paths to cross, doors to open, a life to live.

Ask yourself something, when you are out walking crossing a path do you look up?  Do you see beyond your horizon?  Do you not just walk through a door but occasionally hold one for another?

If you are wondering where I’m going as in metaphorically or literally, it’s both.  

On our journeys in life, we sometimes lose sight of what’s important.  We are focused on the path we’ve chosen and the doors we want to open for ourselves we forget about who we are walking with and why?  

We forget that one day, ages ago someone helped us out.  

Tomorrow, when you wake and just before you head out your door on the day’s journey keep a kind thought tucked away for someone in your travels.  Make eye contact, pass a hug or a little note telling them that they make a difference in your life.  

As much as we all need to hear our value, others need to as well.  

So, all that being said this door to your path wasn’t what you expected ... right?

I am the average....

UG!  I’ve had it up to here... *pointing to forehead* - as if that is truly the limit of where my tolerance goes.

I want to think that compassion goes without boarders, without color and without physical features.  That compassion, somewhere is in everyone’s heart and that it sneaks up on the worst of us.  

I want you to know that it shouldn’t matter where I am from, what my income is or who I believe in.  I know for a fact that I am a decent human being and that I will respect your choices as I hope you respect mine.  

Bullying goes far beyond a classroom of children, far beyond workplace and even families.  It is now going international and I hope for the sake of mankind, the type of bullying I am seeing on the news is shocking.  Yes, I am worried and I hope they find a way to solve the issue before more become hurt both physically and emotionally.  Enough is enough!

I am one of the average human beings who will keep believing in mankind, who will continue to have faith that things will work out and that my tiny words out there will have an impact on changing.  I hope that you keep going forward with the same thoughts and that what we see on the news doesn’t change who you are.  That someone’s negative words or behaviour doesn’t influence you to help a cause that bully’s put’s fear into others.  

Free learning opportunities

Most day’s are great.  I hardly see anything below a half filled glass of water.  I choose to make an effort and to see the better side of things.  

I had a chat with a fellow co-worker today, which is what brought my tiny blog post about.

When I was younger, no matter the amount of things we didn’t have, we were given the opportunity to use what we did.  My beautiful sister taught me that.  

A few years older than myself, I was at the age of 5, and started to compare my life to others around me.  She didn’t have much and came to our family with.. 

actually nothing.  

Then my eyes opened more.  

I have 5 brothers, 1 sister, several cousins and our home ALWAYS had a revolving door to emergency children.  Kids 12 years and younger would stay with us, sometimes for a few hours, some for a few days.  

I got my brothers second hand slacks, played outside shoeless and ate an army’s worth of Mac & Cheese mixed with powered milk (yes, I survived).  We played outside, we made up games, we prayed together as a family and WE had each other.

I had the education that NOT one University could provide. 

Compassion.  To understand the “other side” of the story.
You don’t need much to be happy.

I had to learn that struggling isn’t a bad thing.  It teaches you how to over come and to make the best of what one has.  

Guess what... 

All those lessons were .. 

more or less  

Free.  

Happiness is; making the most of what you have

It’s kind of funny, my day that is.  I cherish the time I spend with my boys, although some day’s limited I own each moment I’m given.  My second favourite thing?  Work.  Most of us wouldn’t say that but I can.  

I have the most eclectic group of people around me and I love it.  

The group is diverse but we all get along.  The best part of it is, we’ve become family.  We can tell when another is out of sorts, when help is needed and when a good laughter break is the answer to everything.  

I’m fortunate to have the opportunity to get through the office on a daily basis.  Some folks I talk in a Batman voice to, some I love to jump out and scare, some I know when they eat their cereal and others when they go for their walks. 

We do what it takes to support each other. Work should be like this, you spend 8 hours (give or take) a day together, that’s 40 hours a week, 160 hours a month, 1,920 hours a year.  

So laugh together, support each other and try your hardest to understand each other.  It is simply an investment in your life that will pay off for years to come.  

Measurements

When I was a younger I measured strength by how much one could pull, push, hold and resist.  I measured ones intelligence by the degree on their wall and measured ones philanthropy by the amount of financial assistance they gave a needy situation. 

Life has a funny way of turning your perspective just when you think you’ve got it figured out.  

Finishing school = I can conquer the world
Raising children = I can do a better job than my parents
facing adversity = I am better than that

tisk, tisk.. a degree does not make you smart, school can only help develop a mind but it’s the soul and life experiences that teach you more than a book.  You’ll come to see that soon one day.  

Raising children?  It’s not a contest.  

Every     single      child

is different.  

They will react to each situation differently.  YOU have to change, YOU have to adapt and YOU will be tested.  It is the endurance you have that will outlast the tests presented by these wee ones.  If you pass this test the reward is undeniably the most priceless, amazing thing you will ever learn.  

This also reflects your ability to face adversity. 

Strength.  Boy was I fooled.  

I thought it was everything to do with the physical being.  In fact, it has mostly to do with your inner strength.  How much you believe in yourself, how much you can emotionally handle and how much you can stand without losing control.  

Last but not least, Philanthropy.  I was told this word defines someone who donates a large sum of money to assist those in need.

I’ve looked this up on line, the definition that is.  

Philanthropy isn’t based on the size of financial assistance but the size of a heart.  the amount of compassion one has to reach out and help others when needed.  

At the end of the day, we learn and evolve.  I hope we do it in the right direction, 

together.  

A picture is worth.... well, it simply can be priceless.

My friends, we will all have down days. Ones that seem hopeless, endless, lightless.

It is in times like these, we look at better times that lift our spirits, put a smile on our faces and a little roar in our bellies.  If we have none of these to reflect upon, then what do we have.

Strength comes from many things but at times alone, they are pulled from memory.  Use that to help guide you to a better place.  Somewhere, if just for a moment to give you a piece of serenity.

I’d put a picture up, some random one that I felt fit’s the blog post but all I keep thinking of, are times with my boys when they make me laugh, watching them plant a garden, listening to their tiny voices read, watching their faces of excitement when that perfect moment in their life happens.  From that first ball they hit in baseball, the first goal in soccer, their first team win. These memories make me smile, these bring me back.

Who are you proving yourself to?

When I was younger, I wanted to have at least one solid connection with a friend.  Due to the constant moving, it was difficult to create relationships and harder to build trust. Like most of us, I grew up wanting to give much of myself away to quickly gain a friend.  

As time as passed, I’ve found that the need to seek out someone to approve of my choices, of who I am or what I want doesn’t matter.  In the end, I am the one to live with the decisions I make daily.  

That all being said, I am happy knowing the ones that want me around, love me for who I am.  This isn’t something that happened one night, one moment but over time and with the conviction that I am okay with me.

So each day, when you wake up face yourself.  Right in the mirror and say to your reflection:

“Yesterday is done and today is a fresh start”.  

Start with discovering you, what makes your head and heart tick, what drives you and stir’s your passion.  

A second thought.

It's funny how life presents itself to us.  Challenges, opportunities, joy's and at times fear.

I will continue to live my life for the moment but like you, constantly need reminders on a few things:

How will it effect others around us?  Sure I want to go sky diving (terribly) but my children may not want me to take that chance.

Would we be okay to live with regrets?  I want to say to you that life shouldn't have regrets but if this applies to the above then perhaps I need to second guess a choice.

Does what I want to do in the moment truly make us happy?  This is one that requires some reflection.  In a moment, when we react perhaps that moment is something that we feel is right.  Is it though? Did it make you happy in the long run?  If not, then you may want to re-evaluate your choice. 

Heck, it's okay to enjoy the moment.  Live life to the fullest but somewhere deep inside if your gut is telling you.... "mmm, perhaps this isn't right".  Then you should give it that "24" hour rule.  You won't effect anyone by holding off, you won't live with a regret and you may be happier for just giving it a second thought. 

Life is full of choices, some amazing, wonderful and unforgettable.  Some we would just rather wish it was another corner we walked pass without a second thought. 

The right frame of mind

I love getting out for my morning walk.  It must be my favourite time of day and the best way to start it.  I clear my head and get into the right frame of mind, which is in my control only.  

What hurts the most is when I read about violence.  Towards others.  I become frustrated towards hurtful words, actions and lack of empathy.  

What I noticed when reflecting on the things that bother me most is, simply put, they are not in my control.

What is?

My happiness.  How I see things, how I react and how I feel.  

It’s our choice to see the value in moments, live today for what it is.  Laugh at any given moment and be the one to live with abandon.  

Do not seek acceptance from others but know you are okay with who you are.  Yesterday, today and tomorrow.  Do not let the things that are not in your control take away your happiness.